Problem connecting with a group of people? Try 'TALK'

My friend Pradeep is a hard working soul. You tell him the work and consider it done. He has earned a reputation of ‘Mr. Dependable’ among his friends, peers and seniors. When talking one on one he is damn impressive. The way he speaks, the variety of information he shares gives the impression that he is quite well read. It leaves the person dialoguing with him with an enriched feeling.

 

However Pradeep faces one peculiar challenge. He finds it difficult to socialise. When with a group of friends or peers he finds it difficult to connect and carry on the conversation. We find a completely changed Pradeep compared to what one sees him while interacting one on one.  

What do you think is not working for him? Can he find a workable solution to this issue?

 

While chatting up with Pradeep he shared with me that he did find a solution to this problem and is in the process of implementing something that he calls the ‘TALK’ formula.

 

I wondered what a formula has to do with connecting with a bunch of people around him.

 

He has defined ‘TALK’ as Technology; Allied interest; Lifestyle and Know-how.  

He says while in a group who says that I have to talk?  To connect with people one can make them speak. And ‘TALK’ helps him do that.  

 

What he does is askes open ended questions around ‘TALK’ and bingo the group is on with the discussion. 

He gives an example of it. The other day he says, I was having lunch with my office mates. I just asked the question around ‘Technology’ the first alphabet of TALK.  Which is the latest mobile these days? And the group started discussing the makes, ease, operating system, processing speed, design, cost etc. Some other time he wanted to check on cars and he had a similar experience.  

Similarly he says that you discover a whole new world when you check the interests’ people have. The discussion becomes quite interesting and enriching.  

Discussion on Lifestyle he says is yet another point people are passionate about. You get to know so many things when people speak on current lifestyle. Same is the case with know-how. You ask people of something that they know or are experts and see how interested they are to share the nuts and bolts of the things they know.  

While the acronym and the method seemed good and was working for him, I had one concern. I asked him doesn’t it bring monotony to the whole process? Trying to put everything into a structure or a framework?

What he told me to this question is more interesting. He said this is just a guiding principle to make myself comfortable with the group and get the discussion going while we are together. It’s not that I just keep asking questions, these points give me a starters to share my experiences as well.  

Initially it does appear to be an effort but with more participation I am becoming comfortable with it.  

‘TALK’ for conversation in a group seems to be going right for Pradeep.